Osama bin Handy

And it’s one, two, three, what are we fighting for?

  • Country Joe and the Fish


Osama bin Laden is dead. That’s it. Ten years of bloody war staged on the pretext capturing purportedly the most dangerous man in the world. Ten years of swarms of CIA operatives scouring Afghanistan yelling “Marco!” and he turns up in the Pakistani Playboy Mansion, less than a kilometre down the road from one of the largest military bases in the country. I’m sorry swingers, but I’m having a bit of a WTF meltdown.

Reports are coming in faster than you can channel-surf as not flocks, but storm-clouds of seagull-journalists descend on Abbottabad (and I seriously can’t believe I haven’t heard a joke about that yet), relaying essentially no information, but taking nice pictures of the wall around the compound. What information does slip through the competence filter is largely contradictory. As I write, the latest news is that bin Laden was not armed, but was resistant to capture, and that his wife attempted to attack the crack troop that confronted them both. She was shot in the leg, he in the head and chest. Who the fuck staged the operation, the US Navy Seals or the Victorian Police Department?

Apparently the CIA has known of his whereabouts for months, long enough at least that they could build a replica of the compound to practice their assault, by some accounts. Yet for all their practice they were unable to capture an allegedly unarmed man and bring him to trial. This should give one pause for thought. The last excuse I heard for the war in Iraq was that we’re bringing democracy and establishing the rule of law. Some example for the kids you’re setting there, Obama. Summary executions are bad if you happen to be any nation but the US or Israel. Not a good look.

So why would we want a trial? Why would we want to put this man, accused of the worst act of terrorism to ever be carried out on US soil, on the stand and make him answer for his alleged crimes? Perhaps to find out if he’s really guilty. That’s what democracies do apparently. The message sort of got lost during the Bush years, but we’ve been told there is (or was) no greater threat to ‘Our Way of Life’ than this malnourished Mungo McCallum look-alike. What is so wrong with the US legal system that he couldn’t have faced due process, and had his guilt or innocence determined by the court? I’m wagering on an utter lack of evidence and the need for a bump in approval ratings for a beleaguered president. I’m not suggesting that bin Laden harboured no malice toward the West. I’m claiming that we will now never know whether he was really behind anything.

That bin Laden was never brought before a magistrate is a cause of abiding shame. It makes a fraud of the supposed rule of law, of any (tenuous) claims of a moral imperative. The West, The East – we’ve been uniformly finger-fucked – all because some idiot wants to keep his job.

It’s all a bit late to talk of this now, though. Bin Laden has apparently been buried at sea, which rules out recovery, let alone an autopsy. We have witnessed a spontaneous outpouring of emotion from the American people matched only in its nationalism and religious fervour by every other whack job, evolutionarily stunted theocracy on Earth. I’ve seen people whipped into ecstatic states before. They fall into two classes – former girlfriends and dangerously deluded idiots. Watching all of the US turn into Alabama rates as one of the scariest things I’ve had the misfortune to witness. America – land of the free, world champion of democracy. Shoot the fucker before he opens his mouth. Namaste.






About Gibbot

Normal working Joe. Occasional musician and writer. Avid reader and political tragic. Humanist. View all posts by Gibbot

2 responses to “Osama bin Handy

  • Ginnie B

    Well written. I would like to say, however, that not all of us in the US have been swept up in rapturous frenzy over OBL’s death. Of course some whackjobs were…but they are the ones getting the press, because the rest of us sitting here saying, “WTF?” don’t make for very exciting newsclips. I had a fairly equally divided response to some rather stir-the-pot comments I knowingly posted on my FB account from people I know in *both* the US and Australia.

    • Gibbot

      My apologies. I don’t really think that all Americans have been caught up in the hype, it’s just how it’s portrayed down here. I hope you’re staying out of the path of the storms.

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